I had rehearsal for Underhill Faire Saturday morning then picked up Eek and headed north to Hawkwood late in the afternoon, so we didn't actually get there til ~10 Saturday night.

And it was wonderful to be in the campground on their arrival. Squeak is even more delightful than her reputation and online presence would suggest...with eyes that can melt you to a puddle. And Erika...well, I won't ruin her curmudgeonly reputation by telling what she's really like...but only 'cause I promised.

During this time, I was at Hawkwood experiencing the sights and sounds of a Texas faire. Now we Coloradoans are supposed to show a certain degree of animosity towards Texans, but it was hard to do so at such a nice faire! The atmosphere is friendly and outgoing, and you never lack for faces to introduce yourself to!

It's all a big friendly family. Never have I been made to feel at home so quickly. And not just by RenGeeks. Even the Fairy Godfather made me welcome (and I apologize for cringing when I first heard about him. That man is one great street performer!)

Of course I got to stroll with the famed Mike Bonk (garbless due to an airline error).

Famed? Well, gee...I was the lucky one in the choice of companions. But let's not bring up the horror of doing a faire in mundane costume instead of proper clothing. Suffice it to say that after an HOUR AND A HALF delay out of Long Beach, and a THREE AND A HALF HOUR delay in Phoenix, LOST LUGGAGE and ANOTHER HALF HOUR delay coming home, skipped beverage service and no attempt to shoosh the incredibly obnoxious frat boys who terrorized one flight, America West is right off my list of acceptable airlines.

We checked in at Dark Rose Armory and talked to Greg and Eric and jingled the chainmail.

I've known Eric for some time, but had not made Greg's acquaintance. My loss. They both rock! And I get brain cramps just trying to imagine making their really fine maille.

Then the stroll about the site continued. I sampled the Woodpecker Ale as was advised. Bonk led the way to meet Suni and her Mommy (I had my daddy, she had her mommy).

Suni, my dear friend...you are just what I expected. *HUG* But your (man's) Mom was an awesome bonus! Thanks for the friendship...and even the Guinness, Mom M'Crack!

From there Suni led us to the McCrack House (Shadow of Time) to meet the others.

Even crippled, Miss Lettie is a hoot, and has a special place in my heart! And her Wood Whore makes some faboo stuff! The M'Crack house isn't really a booth, it's a home...and a popular spot for Celtic jam sessions.

However, the heat was getting to us Coloradoans and the pool back at the hotel was calling! Texas is a very hot place...silly me...I thought the chainmail bikini I was wearing would have been cool enough!

Well, that bikini certainly didn't cool anyone ELSE down. Hmmm...for that matter, neither did the swimwear you changed into for the pool.

Good news upon arriving at the hotel--Bonk's luggage had arrived!

And here Suni was gonna help me get fit for skirts and a bodice if it didn't arrive for Sunday....

Mike Bonk and Lady Tsundane and her cute cute hunk Papa cruised thru the grounds and I happened to catch site of Bonk's garb and recognized him right off. I gave them the Squeak Toy treatment and much squirming and giggling ensued...

Mandi, you looked like you were lining up for inspection for me...head up, shoulders back....mmmmm, is yummies!

We eventually ran into the Lovely Lady Ivy and Madam Danacia and met up over at the Shadow of Time again with all the Wenches to discuss the Walk to happen later that day.

Ivy, now that I've met you I KNOW I came across you years ago at Southern Faire. Can't ever forget that face...even if you were just a kid. And there you are now with two adorable kidlets of your own...one always at a full run. (Not ignoring Fredrick...he just doesn't stay in one place long enough to get to know!). I do envy your living so close to Hawkwood. Gotta love you, my bestest friend, you're the Elizagoth! And Donna--you're really, really somethin! Befny chose her Wench Walk leader very well!

After the organizational attempt, a small group of us went to cheer my father in the costume contest. He had on his nobles despite the heat and humidity. It was a close race--he lost to a good "Herne the Hunter" costume.

Silly contest--more characterization than costume, or your Dad would have had it in the bag (I've been sewing garb for years, but Liz sews like WOW!).

The Walk started around 3pm and Eek, in her Ork ensemble acted as point with Mike Bonk, MarQ and Mr. Tsunade acting as our guards.

Proud Erika, scaring little kiddies all day (but really not meaning too!).

Eek made and excellent point, and was helpful with the deserving but slightly unwilling in holding them down with her claws. And as cute as Mr. Tsunade sounds, it makes me sound like his wife! Hey, we're from Colorado, not Arkansas!

It's Mr. Marcinkowski, folks, and we really need to suck him onto a.f.r 'cause he's definitely one of us! And Tsunade is one of Liz' characters....

We did cover a good amount of territory and wenched many a happy man and learned that Lettie wears some incredibly durable lipstick! One of our best 'hits' was a double play, the GM and President of Hawkwood!

On their knees, in the road in front of a pub...and loving it! Had a chance to talk with James later between "need-your-presence" calls. The man is seriously terrific. Now I know why Hawkwood works.

I then went to catch up with some of my Underhill cohorts who made it up for the day: Fergus, the Sheriff, and the Gypsy/Storie Family--and I got to briefly meet Ed of SCRIBE fame.

Ed? Ed was there? Why didn't you tell me??? Missed our own Goddess of Innocence too, who passed through briefly (darn!). I was looking out for her, but to no avail. Hawkwood is larger than I expected, and so completely covered with trees that anyone and anything not right in front of you blends into the background.

Somewhere about that time I managed to stab myself in the chest with my dagger ("It's only a flesh wound!") and received great admonishhments from both Suni and Lettie for not fixing my sheath like I should have a few weeks ago. Oops.

Well, I would have kissed it and made it better....but you still had that blade in your hand....

The Clan M'Crack initiation was Sunday evening and so I saw several of my sisters become one with M'Crack.. er... (Hi Prude'n!) and as the grand finale for the initiation, the Clan M'Crack did show the crowd a Full Moon, as was appropriate to the whole spectacle. Yeah, but a few were wearing something beneath their kilts! GRRRRRR!!!!!

And their skirts. GRRRRR indeed!!!!

Somewhere along the line I apparently tripped in a large invisible hole and twisted my knee up but good. So the rest of the day we decided to take it slow and shop and hobble around....

Nice knee...not so nice swelling. Now what did you flash to get that free ale again...?

My morning was spent wandering the faire, trying to catch all the booths I had missed, and also shading my eyes from Bonk's garb. He had worn the dreaded "neon peasants." For those of you who have never seen this garb, I shall warn you now--wear sunglasses. He is brighter and louder than the Fairy Godfather.

I dunno...he seemed to think we matched rather well.

People would greet us as we appeared with "You look beautiful, and you look...well....bright." It was often hard for them to find the right words to accurately sum up the shock and pain and amusement!

Actually, before hangovers wore off, it was mostly shrieks or groans.

I also had my picture taken by the ladies at "Your Ideal Image." It was a great opportunity to capture my new gold dress on film.

Dress, schmess. It was that wonderful face they were capturing...and the white dove was a precious accent...despite the stain "Poo" added to your dress...(alongside the one from where you ate my sausage).

The renFair Stalker, aka Dana the photographer, was on-hand Monday doing his thing...

As a major admirer of his pics, it was great to meet Dana at last (and he recognized me first...spooky). I am sooo looking forward to seeing some of the pics he took...(relax, kids...not of me!).

So that's where you were hiding! Well, Donna and Eek and Bonk and I enjoyed another circle of the grounds. We had sno-cones and then pretended we couldn't find Bonk in this little woodsy bit at the "delta" of the Riverwalk. "I'm looking for a man about this tall wearing bright clothes. Have you seen him?"

Silly works, and it was nice to entertain some of the children there with that for a bit.

The highlight came when we wandered past the bakery just as a batch of loaves were finishing their time in the oven!

A real bakery, with real fresh everything. They just can't keep up with demand. But oooo...the bread...!

Ran into Bonk and Miss Tsunade where it was discovered that she is quite the ham! And Dana got lots of gorgeous shots of her, I am certain.

Must have! Oh, Dana....!

Along about this time, Greg earned his Rogue stripes... um.. I'll let the pictures speak for that! I have a great picture of Greg with the proof of the pudding between his teeth!

Well, heck: I've got him in action (oooo la la!).

See you guys for the Real Invasion! I sadly won't be there...but there is always next year, right?

I'll be there, but it won't be the same without those who have to work instead. *pout*

Tsunade
Participant in the first ever Hawkwood Wench Walk
Wearer of a chainmail bikini, Pendragon bodice, and gold dress.
Owner of the steaming corset
Wench #402

I can vouch for all that and more!

Mike (Numps MacDóbhran)
Bonkity Bonk Bonk Bonk
First a.f.r. High Priest of Love and Designated Peter Pan
Certified Manly Man (twice!)
hatchling

Standard Disclaimer: These webpages are strictly an *Unofficial* look at the Hawkwood Medieval Fantasy Faire held near Fort Worth, Texas in 1998. The author of these pages is in no way, shape, manner or form connected with the Hawkwood Medieval Fantasy Faire, Past Times Productions and/or any of the sponsors associated with this event. All opinions expressed are strictly this author's own. Unless expressly noted otherwise, all photographs are copyright ©1998 by George Laking.

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