I had rehearsal for Underhill Faire Saturday morning then picked up Eek (good grief, Eek and Squeak... almost as bad as when I lived with my friend Mindy and I went by Mandi) and headed north to Hawkwood late in the afternoon, so we didn't actually get there til ~10 Saturday night.

During this time, I was at Hawkwood experiencing the sights and sounds of a Texas faire. Now we Coloradoans are supposed to show a certain degree of animosity towards Texans, but it was hard to do so at such a nice faire! The atmosphere is friendly and outgoing, and you never lack for faces to introduce yourself to! Of course I got to stroll with the famed Mike Bonk (garbless due to an airline error). We checked in at Dark Rose Armory and talked to Greg and Eric and jingled the chainmail. Then the stroll about the site continued. I sampled the Woodpecker Ale as was advised (Photo, above right: the lovely Tsunade takes her ease in the shade with a large mug of "adult beverage" for company. Photo courtesy of Tsunade). Bonk led the way to meet Suni and her Mommy (I had my daddy, she had her mommy).

From there Suni led us to the McCrack House (Shadow of Time) to meet the others. However, the heat was getting to us Coloradoans and the pool back at the hotel was calling! Texas is a very hot place... Silly me: I thought the chainmail bikini I was wearing would have been cool enough! Good news upon arriving at the hotel--Bonk's luggage had arrived! After a swim and dinner, it was back to the 'Wood with Bonk feeling more like himself! This is where Mandy's story begins again...

Upon arrival we were greeted by MarQ and his happy band of Roguely Scots (Jody, Jason, Chris, Dave, et al) and pretty ladies and there was much drinking and silliness and games of skill and chance (spin the bottle and"I Never"... good l_rd, we are all in high school again!) and I was presented with a special Squeak Toy, which I did use to intimidate and irritate the entire campsite for the rest of the weekend. At least I was easy to find after that!

The squeakie toy is precious. She let me squeeze it, too!

We eventually ran into the Lovely Lady Ivy and Madam Danacia and met up over at the Shadow of Time again with all the Wenches to discuss the Walk to happen later that day. Given the nature of the beast, the meeting was fairly disorganized and not a lot was achieved, but we sure had fun! It turns out that none of us know any of the songs real well, but we fake it pretty good!

After the organizational attempt, a small group of us went to cheer my father in the costume contest. He had on his nobles (garb) despite the heat and humidity. It was a close race--he lost to a good "Herne the Hunter" costume.

The Walk started around 3pm and Eek, in her Ork ensemble acted as point with Mike Bonk, MarQ and Mr. Tsunade acting as our guards.

Eek made an excellent point, and was helpful with the deserving--but slightly unwilling--in holding them down with her claws. And as cute as "Mr. Tsunade" sounds, it makes me sound like his wife! Hey, we're from Colorado, not Arkansas!

We did cover a good amount of territory and wenched many a happy man and learned that Lettie wears some incredibly durable lipstick! We finished up at the Dark Rose (MAN THAT PLACE IS YELLOW) Armoury and the finale was wenching our wonderful guards, and then Greg (co-owner of the Dark Rose) himself.

Greg threw himself at the feet of the wenches, begging and pleading for it, even though the walk was over....JOKE! It was suggested and we all decided to keep wenching as Greg was such a great host!

The Clan M'Crack initiation was Sunday evening and so I saw several of my sisters become one with M'Crack.. er... (Hi Prude'n!) and as the grand finale for the initiation, the Clan M'Crack did show the crowd a Full Moon, as was appropriate to the whole spectacle.

Yeah, but a few were wearing something beneath their kilts! GRRRRRR!!!!!

Afterwards, the fun eventually moved back out to the campgrounds where there was WONDEROUS mead via Dark Rose Armory's Greg.. YUMMMM! Ivy and Danacia and Suni showed up to chat and sip for a while. Jacob, the Hunka-Red-Headed-Man Scotsman turned up to play for a bit and did amaze and astound us all with his abilities with the Squeak Toy. Look Ma, no hands!

I missed this, sadly...I had retreated for a cool swim back at the hotel!

Next morning lots of our happy campers were not so happy as they had to leave and go work and so we struck the whole campsite, packed up and went in. Somewhere along the line I apparently tripped in a large invisible hole and twisted my knee up but good. So the rest of the day we decided to take it slow and shop and hobble around. The Wench Walk did not go as planned on Monday as I think we were all just TOO worn out from the weekend.

My morning was spent wandering the faire, trying to catch all the booths I had missed, and also shading my eyes from Bonk's garb. He had worn the dreaded "neon peasants." For those of you who have never seen this garb, I shall warn you now: wear sunglasses. He is brighter and louder than the Fairy Godfather (Photo, right: by way of comparison, the Fairy Godfather appears in the far right of this picture taken during the daily Parade of villagefolk at Hawkwood. Having seen photos of Mike Bonk's "neons" online, it would be hard to say which of these two is really gaudier in color and costume!) People would greet us as we appeared with "You look beautiful, and you look...well....bright." It was often hard for them to find the right words to accurately sum up the shock and pain and amusement!

Time was spent at the heraldry booth with my new pendant. The fellow there is going to try to track down the coat of arms on it, and hopefully we may find if it is an authentic crest or one created by the jeweler. I also had my picture taken by the ladies at "Your Ideal Image." It was a great opportunity to capture my new gold dress on film.

The renFair Stalker, aka Dana the photographer, was on-hand Monday doing his thing, and it turns out there was a birthday party for him over at the uh.. Glass etching place, of which I have forgotten the name. Anyway there was cake and punch and I did my very best Marilyn Monroe "Happy Birthday" as I could muster and he seemed pleased, which is a good thing. Must appease the photo g_ds or they will print unflattering portraits!

So that's where you were hiding! Well Donna and Eek and Bonk and I enjoyed another circle of the grounds. We had sno-cones and then pretended we couldn't find Bonk in this little woodsy bit at the "delta" of the Riverwalk. "I'm looking for a man about this tall, wearing bright clothes. Have you seen him?" The highlight came when we wandered past the bakery just as a batch of loaves were finishing their time in the oven!

Ran into Bonk and Miss Tsunade where it was discovered that she is quite the ham! And Dana got lots of gorgeous shots of her, I am certain. Along about this time, Greg earned his Rogue stripes... um.. I'll let the pictures speak for that!

I have a great picture of Greg with the proof of the pudding between his teeth!

ps: MarQ, I have the little blue grill... it was left behind and looked so lonely in the field, I had to take it! Will make arrangements to get it back up there this weekend if needed.

I sadly won't be there...but there is always next year, right?

Tsunade
Participant in the first ever Hawkwood Wench Walk
Wearer of a chainmail bikini, Pendragon bodice, and gold dress
Owner of the steaming corset
Wench #402

Standard Disclaimer: These webpages are strictly an *Unofficial* look at the Hawkwood Medieval Fantasy Faire held near Fort Worth, Texas in 1998. The author of these pages is in no way, shape, manner or form connected with the Hawkwood Medieval Fantasy Faire, Past Times Productions and/or any of the sponsors associated with this event. All opinions expressed are strictly this author's own. Unless expressly noted otherwise, all photographs are copyright ©1998 by George Laking.

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